All Moved In

Well, we're here!!! We finally got internet, but since we're so busy unpacking still, I haven't had a chance to update you all. Things went surprisingly well with the move, and we were actually down here earlier than planned. We loaded the truck in an hour and with a lot of help, had the truck unloaded in 20 minutes. You read that right, TWENTY MINUTES!!!!!! :) Amazing. Now the big task is getting everything unpacked and in their proper places.

We discovered something I didn't know about the house, and something I'm way too excited about. I have... and brace yourselves for this... an automatic garage door opener, with a garage I can drive into. Do you know how awesome this is? Really, do you!??! I'm way too pumped about it, and probably need to bring down the excitement one or two notches. Other than that, everything still has exceeded our expectations. We've had dinner with my folks a few nights already, Forrest's parents are coming down tonight, and his dad tomorrow night... So things couldn't be better. Well, they would if I came across a box labled "Friends from VA".

Well, back to the unpacking!!!

I'll update later with pictures!!

Friends

Last night, I had dinner with Beth and Sarah. Shepherd joined us, as Forrest had to work late (poor guy is so stressed out at work, not to mention trying to get the house packed up at night). Anyways... we met for dinner and had a great time talking and laughing, and mainly watching Shepherd spaz out because it was way past his bedtime. At the end of the night, we said our goodbyes, discussing ways to get together. We hung around outside until it was obvious we needed to go . I turned and as I walked away I cried.

You never think you're going to meet such wonderful people online. I've always had the opposite experience. I used to meet guys online and date them. They always ended up being such jerks and so I grew weary of meeting people online. But I got over that, and I'm so glad I did. I've never had friends who would dare to be as honest with you as these two are. to say in the same breath, "I'm so happy for you, but so pissed off that you're leaving." I guess some people would be hurt by that, but it meant so much to me. Because I totally understand that feeling. I'm so happy to be moving home, but so pissed off to leave my friends behind. It's that honesty that makes me love these two.

Anyways, I really didn't want this to turn into some glorious lovefest about my friends, but maybe somehow this will encourage someone out there to take a step to meet someone. To open up and let go of their reservations to make new friends. Too many women out there never step food foot (thanks for the catch, Justin) out of their homes to meet new friends. They spend their lives alone (save for the company of their children, husbands and family) and never experience the true joy that comes with friendships. I know, because I've been there. I've stayed home, holed away, afraid of putting myself out there for fear of being hurt, slowly growing more and more alone. I'm so grateful for the friends I have now, and know that I don't have to go through this motherhood thing alone. So, to my friends.... Thank you. :)

Lost and Found

They found Michael Auberry. Being from the triad area, my heart and prayers have been with his family and with him the last few days, and it's wonderful to have such a positive outcome to this story.

Crazy Busy

Well, things around here have slowly deteriorated into chaos what with the packing for the impending move and all. Our house is in shambles, and my internet connection dies tonight. Yes... I will be without the net as of 11:59pm tonight... unless I can find a connection to bootleg with our wireless card. Either that or I just have a new excuse to go to Panera.

Shepherd's been sick this past week too, which explains a lot of the previous entry, what with the lack of sleeping and the general fussiness. The worst part is that it doesn't seem to be getting any better, so we're back off to the doctor's office this morning. Then it's back to the chaos of packing and trying desperately to finish the laundry so we can pack it all up....

Daylights Savings: Just another scheme to drive mothers nuts

I type this sitting in my car in front of Panera bread, totally ripping from their free internet. Why am I sitting here? Because Shepherd refused his nap for the third day in a row, and in an effort to maintain my sanity, I put him in the car, grabbed my laptop, and drove around until he fell asleep. Right now, I have his favorite song on repeat, and he's zonked out in the backseat. For three days, I've not gotten a chance to nap, as I usually do. For you pregnant women out there, you know how nutty this can drive you. Not only has his nap schedule screwed up, but he's now wanting to wake up at the ungodly hour of 6 am (he was sleeping until 7 am before the time change) (so, technically speaking, he's now waking up at 5 am) (I'm so screwed).

I've read all of Moxie's posts on Daylight Savings and kids, and honestly, I'm so turned around. I figured at first I'd try the whole, he doesn't know the time has changed, he'll go down at 8, wake up at 8 (he was going 7 to 7) and all will be fine. The only problem is he now wants to go down at 7 still (6 pm before the time change) and wakes up an hour earlier. So he's sleeping less at night, and he's sleeping less during the day. The part that really sucks about all of this is that he's also trasitioning from two naps a day to one. He kicked his third nap to the curb a month ago with no trouble. I figured he'd do the same with this one, but obviously it's more of a problem than I'd thought.

I guess I should add that our lives are total chaos right now too, with boxes everywhere, and things thrown hither and yonder as we sort and pack. I'm trying not to let it get to me, so I can't imagine how it's affecting him. I'm sure he's confused as to what's going on, but there's no way for me to explain to a 12 month old that we're moving and things will resume to their normal state in a few weeks. Oh well...

At least with the time that he's not napping he's a totally cutie pie, learning so much, so fast. Today he spent 15 minutes sitting in my lap, playing with my face. I started teaching him the names for the parts, like nose, mouth, and eye, pointing out his as well. After a while, I asked him where his nose was, and he pointed to his nose, and said "nuh". So smart!! It's alarming how fast he learns these things. Over the weekend, we taught him how to sign "bunny rabbit" and he loves pointing to the bunny on the cover of one of his books, then signing his sign. Too cute!! :) So I guess I should take the good and leave the bad. Although it would be great to get a nap every now and then.....

The Dichotomy of Leaving

I've started this post 3 or 4 times, and never can come up with the right words. The past several weeks have been insane, and all the things I wanted to blog about, I haven't been able to. You see, we've been in the process of looking for jobs in North Carolina. Once we found out that I was expecting in September, we realized quickly that we needed to move. We can hardly afford living in Northern Virginia with one child, much less two. Not only that, but Shepherd is getting older, and we really want him to know his grandparents. Being so far away has limited his time with them, so moving closer to home would be a huge blessing.

We started the process fully aware that it might take some time for Forrest to secure a good job. We didn't want him to take just anything, it had to be great. The first few places he contacted weren't hiring, but were extremely excited about him being back in the area (read: Forrest ROCKS at what he does and people were WISHING they could hire him) (he's going to kill me for that comment). Anyways... Forrest heard through a friend that a firm near our families was hiring. He contacted them, and immediately they set up an interview. He loved the place, he loved the place, and they made him an offer. We hemmed and hawed for about a week, trying to decide what to do. Was this the place for us? Was this it? And finally, decided that this was it. That he'd take the job and we'd move.

I told some friends that I was surprised by my initial reaction. I was excited to be closer to home, to be in North Carolina again, where the pace of life is much, much slower, where my kids will know their grandparents, and where rent was WAYYYY more affordable. Yet at the same time, I was sort of bummed to leave some dear friends that I've met, and grown close to, especially in the past few months. I know these types of friends are hard to come by, and these two are one in a million. There are many other friends we've made in the past 6 months, and they will be hard to leave as well. So in lieu of singing the Hallellujah chorus 2 octaves higher than necessary, I found myself torn between these two emotions. I love my friends, yet I hate living here. I'm excited about moving home, yet terrified I won't make new friends like the ones I have. I've offered to pack my friends up in a box and move them with me, but they objected with some excuse about having a family to take care of, or something lame like that. :)

So anyways, I guess this is all to say that we're excited about moving. When I think about the house we're going to live in (yes, we already found a house to rent!) (a real live house) (with a back yard) (and a garage) (at 25% less than we're paying for our current 2 bedroom hole in the wall) I get really excited. I can't wait to have a place to let Shepherd run around. I can't wait to be close to my mom and dad. To be close to my in-laws. To be somewhere familiar again. To be home.......

Yes, this is our real live house.... I can't wait

Busy Bees

Sorry for the lack of posts this week, and thank you for all your suggestions for things to do. Liza suggested some DC stuff... which normally I'm game for. Only thing is I live a good 30 minutes from the District. However, on Tuesday, I didn't let that stop me, and Shepherd and I spent the afternoon at the National Zoo. All in all it was a great afternoon. Shepherd loved most of the animals with a few exceptions. T

he toucans were fascinating at first, but when they started flying around, they spooked Shepherd a little. Then the otters put on a show for us by swimming back and forth, swimming directly at the glass. It did look as though they could come through the glass and tickle Shepherd to death (Otters are so dadgum cute!), but I guess from his perspective they looked as though they could eat him. Finally, the Tiger was a huge hit..at first. The poor guy was starving and pacing back and forth in front of the door where I guess they feed him. After a few minutes, he let out a huge roar, which scared Shepherd to death. Shepherd started screaming, and I started walking quickly away. Some idiot thought it was hilarious, and egged the tiger on by roaring back. They roared like that until I was out of sight, but mind you, had Forrest been there to walk Shepherd away, I probably would have had words with the idiot. What kind of jerk thinks it's funny to scare a baby??? Moving on... Our favorite part was the sloth bears and the fishing cat, to which Shepherd repeatedly said, "tat! tat! tat!"

Needless to say, he was worn slap out that night (I was too for that matter). Then yesterday, we went to our bi-weekly MOPS meeting at church, where he had a blast running around with all the other little munchkins his age, and I had a blast eating breakfast on my own without little man while visiting with other grown ups. Today, was Gymboree, which Shepherd TOTALLY LOVES. It was his birthday gift from everyone... and he totally made use of his time. I'm guessing I'll get a good nap out of him this afternoon.

Anyways... that's what we've been up to lately, and I'm sure one of these days I'll post something a lot less boring, but I thought I'd bring folks up to date.

Cabin Fever

I think this week has been the earliest in my life that I have uttered "I wish it was spring already". I'm so tired of cold weather, mostly because I love going outside. I miss going out to get fresh air without having to bundle up as though we're headed for an artic excursion. Granted, I don't always dress that way, but dressing a toddler for outside feels as though I'm wrestling a 24 pound baby seal into a jacket and a hat. Todays high is supposed to be 53 degrees, but with snow on the ground and sidewalks, even a walk outside will be a chore. Don't get me wrong, I'll still go outside, because otherwise, I'll develop a bad case of cabin fever.

I've always been a winter person, always relishing the cold, enjoying the snow, and wrapping myself in blankets cradling a cup of hot cocoa. But this winter, I've utterly despised the cold. It's just hard to get out in with an active one year old. He doesn't seem to have the tolerence for the cold that I do (hmmm... wonder why? Maybe he's 200 lbs lighter?!?!) and gets quite fussy if he gets cold. I've gotten creative in our outings this winter, and I've tried to get out once a day. This week promises to be the best week for outings, as we start Gymboree this week, along with the other list of activities I have written out. But today? Today I'm stumped. I'm tempted to stay inside all day, but know that if I do, by the time Forrest gets home, I'll be sitting in the corner, rocking to and fro, giggling quitely to myself as I slowly succumb to the mania.

So this is where I need your help... What are some things YOU do to get out during the dead of winter? What are some activities you do around the house that get your mind off of being stuck inside(and don't say cleaning... I've already cleaned my house... I even bought a real mop!!)?

Weekend Recap

This weekend was surprisingly relaxing, seeing as it included a lot of cleaning and plenty of play in the surprise snowstorm we got. We worked hard and played harder, but something about being home for the first weekend in a while with nothing to do just made it a perfect weekend.

Again with the climbing
SNOW!
Mommy and me playing in the snow
The snow was coming down so hard that after only a 15 minute walk in the snow, Forrest and Shepherd had almost an inch of snow in them!
Daddy playing with Shepherd's Doodle Pro
If only I could teach him how to use this...
More fun with the Swiffer
The number one reason our weekend was so great... the cutest kid EVER

So totally screwed.....

I only wish I had a picture of him hanging (yes HANGING) from the end table this morning.

12 months

Shepherd,

Yesterday, you turned one. O-N-E. That number is enough to make my head spin at all of the things that have happened in the last 365 days. One year ago, you were handed to me, a wrinkled, slimey, red bundle of pure heaven. I remember the moment I laid hands on you, and it was magical. Nothing in this life has ever compared to that moment. We'd waited so long for you to arrive, in fact, it seemed as though you'd never come. And then you came. And it seemed as though you'd always been here. You have changed so much this last year. So much, that I hardley recognize the little tiny bundle of baby in the pictures we took that day. You've developed into this wonderful and beautiful person, whose smile and laugh brighten any room.


You know how to tell jokes now... well, not really "tell" jokes, but you know what we find funny and you do those things to make us laugh. Just last week, on our road trip down to see Papa D in the hospital, you woke up in the middle of the night, 30 minutes before we got to Gram and Grandaddy's house. Those 30 minutes you spent entertaining us with a variety of raspberries and noises you've learned. Some were quite impressive! We laughed and laughed, and it was just what mommy and daddy needed on that last leg of the trip.


This past weekend, we celebrated your birthday. We had family over for cake and ice cream, and you had a blast with everyone. After a little while, though, you'd had enough of all the commotion, so we started on presents and then we ate cake. It took you a second to dive into the cake, but after a few small bites, you dove right in and smeared icing all over your face. :) It was a busy day full of excitement, and after cake, you crashed hard for a long and much needed nap.


As you were going to sleep, I sat there, holding you, and thought of all of the changes that have occured in the last year and about how much you've grown. I couldn't help but cry, not because I was sad that you'd grown up, but because of all the joy you have brought me. I've always known that I wanted to be a mother. And with your birth came the unexpected joy and fulfillment that I'd longed for all that time. You are my wish come true. I cannot imagine my life without you in it.


I love you more than I can express. Happy Birthday lil' man.

Love,
Mommy

Update

Hello All...

I'm still down in NC where the weather is actually decent. Poor Forrest drove back to work a few days and found himself in a nasty snow/sleet/ice/freezing rain storm. But all is well.

I talked with his mom this morning, and things are daily improving with his step-dad. His kidney function is much better, his swelling is down... and they've almost got him completely off the ventilator. He has to wake up before they take him 100% off. The ventilator is breathing about only 4 times a minute for him, which is much better than 100% of the time. It'll take a while to wake up since the anesthesia is stored in the body, and takes a while to wear off. So, things are looking much better than a few days ago.

Shepherd has died and gone to heaven here at Gram and Grandaddy's. He has 24 hour access to a real, live D-O-G (as Shepherd would call it, the "og" or he'd just pant like the dog). Also in the house is a real, live C-A-T, "tat". That and the much needed room to run around the house and wear his little self slap out. He's slept better than he's ever slept these past few nights, sleeping from 7 to 8 am (not counting the few times he wakes up because of the MOLARS he's cutting)(MOLARS!!!!)(My baby is getting so big!)

Anyways... we've got a big party planned for Saturday, and I've still not decided what to do about the cake. I'm sure it'll come to me. Oh well, little man is almost done with lunch (I'm sitting at the kitchen table typing as he eats), so I'd better go.

Thanks again for all your prayers/thoughts/meditations!!

Prayers

Hey guys,

Quick update. I hadn't written much about it out of respect for privacy, but I feel that I need to get this out. My husband's step-father had surgery last week (gastric bypass). Things looked fine at first, but there were come complications, and he's now in critical care in the ICU (on a ventilator, which is so, so, SO scary). There's so much to explain, and not enough energy to explain it... but your prayers and thoughts and meditations would be greatly appreciated. Forrest is with his mom tonight, and I'm back at my parents to get Shepherd (he spent the weekend with them while we spent the weekend at the hospital). Hopefully things will start improving in the next few days... I'll try to keep things updated...

Cravings?

Our little mechanic

Good news, folks! I'm actually eating again... and not getting sick! I finally sucked it up and asked the doctor for some mild medication for the nausea. I only take it once a day (it's recommended for up to 4 times a day) and that seems to have helped a LOT so far. In fact, last night, I started with the cravings. Actually, they started Sunday at our friends Super Bowl party. One of the guys brought this heavenly french onion dip. I must have eaten half of the dip and chips. That, and they had some cans of coke. I had a coke and it immediately settled my stomach. I'd been avoiding them because of the caffeine, but my doctor suggested that I try one every now and then for my stomach. She seemed to think it might help. Which... it does, but now I'm craving coke, Ruffles, and french onion dip all the time!!!

In other news, I was getting ready for bed last night, and finally, around 11 (I know, it was way too late to be up), I just HAD it with my kitchen. So I got down on my knees and scrubbed the floors. I scrubbed because there was junk encrusted on our floor that I don't even KNOW what it was. Once I scrubbed the floors, I scrubbed the stove... then the counters... then cleaned all the junk off of our table! So today, I woke up to a nice, clean, kitchen. Do you have any idea what that feels like? That, and the laundry is done (thanks to the local laundromat where I did 5 loads of laundry in the time it takes to do one load at home). The only thing I need to do is clean the bathrooms and vacumn the entire house. Any volunteers??

I will say, I've been in a much better mood these past few days. I knew that this day would come, it just felt like it took forever. I actually have energy to play with Shepherd, I have a little energy left at the end of the day to attempt to cook dinner. It's amazing what a difference a single pill can make. :)

The only downside is that Shepherd is now cutting his bottom molars. So the poor guy is miserable. I finally got my fingers back in his mouth and felt the bulging of the molars. Poor guy! Makes me so sad. Last night, he cried and fussed for an hour solid before Forrest got home. Nothing I did helped. It wasn't until Forrest got home, and we started signing for "bath" that he got excited and quit fussing. So, while Forrest gave him a bath and put him to bed, I took a much needed break and made a run to the grocery store. It's amazing how frayed your nerves can get with an hour of your child crying. I hadn't been to the store in a while (other than for basic necessities) as I hadn't felt well enough to eat anything. But last night, it was all I could do to not buy the entire store out. I did purchase some french onion dip. I balanced my junk food purchase with a bunch of bananas. Shepherd would eat bananas all the live long day if I let him, so we go through them pretty fast.

Anyways... after shopping, I came home, where Forrest and I sat down and watched a few of my Friends DVDs. I'd forgotten how nice it is to just sit and watch Friends without commercials, and to just enjoy cuddling on the couch with my hubby (I haven't been much of a cuddler with the sick tummy). I'm so glad things are starting to turn around... hopefully, Shepherd will start feeling better, and all will be wonderful!!! :)

Baby Steps

Last night.... I vacumned. Aren't you proud of me? I stood in our living room, grabbed my hair and finally screamed, "I've had it!" Only, I didn't scream... I more muttered to myself. I put Shepherd's toys away and vacumned. And it felt wonderful. And while I was vacumning, Forrest did the dishes in the kitchen. My living room was spotless this morning. It felt so wonderful to walk out into a clean living room.

My goal this weekend is to tackle the laundry. I'm sure some of you are thinking that it can't be that bad. Let me explain. Last night, I had to do one load of laundry simply because Forrest had nothing to wear. I mean nothing. At least nothing clean. Which, you know, if I don't wear clean shirts, no one knows... wait, was that to much information? I swear I don't run around every day in dirty clothes... just... you know... sometimes....when the laundry is backed up... you know... because I have a kid and I've been sick.... that's normal... right? Anyways... so I did a load of laundry (actually, Forrest transfered them from washer to dryer because I was in bed exhausted). That said, I have GOT to do laundry this weekend. Which beckons the question. How bad has the laundry situation gotten at your house? I'm contemplating taking the laundry to a laundermat so I can wash everything at one time and dry everything at one time. That's how bad it is.

Anyways... I haven't posted a picture of the lil' man quite a while, here's one post-traumatic haircut (I still haven't blogged about it because I'm just not there emotionally... let's just say it involved a lady who barely spoke english, some scissors, and massive amounts of sobbing and tears by me) and then one of my two men in the snow a few weeks ago.


Mommy promises that in a few weeks the kids at playgroup will stop calling me Lloyd

Aren't they adorable? And isn't my husband HOTT!?

The Almighty Wipeout

Today was going to be a great day. We were going to meet Beth and Mia for lunch at my favorite place in all the world, P.F. Chang's. We were going to Get! Out! of! The! House! The house that has taken on a life of its own, with dirty laundry piles in the bedroom, the bathroom, the living room, the kitchen, and God only knows where else. The house with the kitchen floor that hasn't been mopped in weeks (and has only seen the broom maybe 3 times in that time). For those of you with a toddler learning to self-feed know exactly how filthy my floor is right now. Especially when the broom misses a few peas your toddler has chucked across the room, and you slim the bottom of your foot and smear peas across the kitchen floor during a midnight raid on the fridge. Yeah, it's pretty bad. I finally managed to move the laundry that had been sitting in the laundry for the last week into the dryer (only after washing it 4 times because they'd soured, and each time forgetting to move them). That laundry has been taken out of the dryer and is now sitting on my couch, begging to be folded. The living room hasn't been vacumned since the beginning of the month, and dusting? I forget, remind me what that is?

Some of you may blame my husband for not picking up the slack. To those of you who say that, I say a hearty "Screw You!" My husband has been amazing these last few weeks (heck, who am I kidding, he's always been amazing). He now wakes up between 4:30 and 5:30 to give Shepherd his morning bottle, allowing me to sleep through until at least 7 am. He's kept our dishes clean, and he's not uttered one word about the filth we now live in. To top it off, each weekend, when I'm passed out from exhaustion from running around all week with Shepherd and growing a baby, he gladly takes Shepherd and plays with him while I sleep, and sleep, and sleep some more. And despite all of that, he's gone to work every day, worked his butt off, and comes home every night exhausted from the hour and half commute TO work, and then again home. So after spending 3 hours in a car, he comes home, feeds Shepherd dinner, gives Shepherd a bath, and then puts Shepherd to bed. So, no, it's not that.

I know one of these days I'll catch up. I feel that I'm behind in everything. Not only am I behind in housework, I'm behind on my friendships. I haven't kept in touch with friends like I want to... Normally, I'll e-mail folks several times a week, and yet, I find it utterly exhausting to sit down at the computer and type. The same goes for blogging. All I've written about is how bad I feel, but I guess that's to be expected. I feel as though I'm losing readers, who come to the site for something else, and instead leave utterly depressed, or there are those who kindly write me encouragement, and I feel guilty. Like they've written because they felt obligated to cheer me up from this hum-drum slump I've been in. I know it's not the case, but still...

I don't even know the purpose of writing this, except maybe to get it off of my chest. I so very much want things to return to a semi-normal state, where I have at least enough energy to put clothes in the laundry one day, and enough the next to mop, and the next to vacumn. My only hope is that magically, overnight, the cleaning fairy will show up and do everything for me. Who says you can't dream?

No nap Monday

As I type this, Shepherd is refusing his afternoon nap, leaving one very grumpy boy and one very exhausted mommy. I finally had it with his grumpiness, and put him in his crib, where he is currently screaming because he's mad at me. I know, I'm the worst mother ever (which I know is totally not true, because sometimes we mothers just need a gosh darn BREAK).

Anyways.. I haven't been the best at writing lately, probably because the only things I can think to write about are the morning sickness, the exhaustion, and again with the morning sickness. (Ooo, the screaming stopped! maybe he's asleep?) I know you guys have heard enough of the "whoa is me! I'm sick" shpeel, so on to better things.

Shepherd is learning things super fast now. Faster than I'd expected, and honestly, I'm surprised at how smart he is. It's amazing what these little ones are capable of communicating at such an early age. On Friday of last week, we went over to Sarah's house for a playdate with Claudia, Ian, and Mia. Sarah has these two cats, which Shepherd totally ADORED. The entire time we were there, he chased them and kept calling after them, "tat!" "tat!" Yes, it's official, my son now knows how to say "cat". Over the weekend, I showed Forrest how Shepherd will wave bye-bye to the apartment when we leave to go somewhere, and on Saturday, as we were putting his coat on, he started waving and saying, "ba-ba" over and over again until we left. It's so amazing that he can say and understand that concept.

This morning, after he woke up, and spent a good 30 minutes crawling around the apartment calling out for "da-da", he finally walked into the living room, and looked at me, then turned around, leaned against the sofa, and waved to the apartment, "ba-ba". This kid is SMART! He was telling me he wanted to either go get daddy, or he just wanted out of our tight quarters. So I bundled him up, and we headed to DC. We went to the National Museum of Natural History to look at the dinosaurs and the other animals there. Shepherd was totally fascinated with everything, and would squeal out in joy at every new thing he saw. It was so adorable. After a while there, we left (I was beginning to feel sick again). On our way home, we stopped for lunch, and I ate my first "real meal" (something that consisted of something other than bacon and yogurt) in over a week. And so far, I've kept it down. YAY! Ever since, we've been home playing. I'd love to report that Shepherd is STILL napping, but no such luck... he's screaming again, so I'd probably better go...

Looking up

Yay! Mommy feels okay enough to play!!!

Today things are better. I realized that my last several posts have been "poor, poor me" posts, and realize that there are many worse things that could be going on right now than morning sickness. For that I am thankful.

This morning was wonderful... Forrest brought me breakfast in bed (am I lucky or WHAT?!) A wonderful breakfast of bacon and Eggo waffles. I can't help but wonder if it wasn't that very thing that has helped me today. I was able to eat breakfast before getting out of bed, and I actually haven't been sick at all today. I've actually cleaned up a little, and straightened up the house, which feels great. I can't tell you how bad it makes you feel to see your house go to shambles when you have no energy to do anything about it.

I've been able to play with Shepherd today, which he seems to really enjoy. In fact, he's been worn out from all the walking, and the dancing we've been doing. Yes... dancing. It's so adorable. When I put some music on, he'll walk up and down the hall shaking his hands in the air and shaking his head back and forth. Either that, or he'll find something to hold on to, and bounce up and down while shaking his head. It's great... the better the music, the more he gets into it.

He's really learning SO much and so FAST! He's been signing for "food" for a while, and last week, Forrest introduced the sign for "bath" since Shepherd really, really loves his bathtime. Right after he finishes dinner and we're cleaning up his tray, he starts patting his chest and rubbing it up and down, which is the sign for bath. It's amazing that he knows that bathtime comes right after dinner. :) So smart!!!

Other than the morning sickness... I'm definately feeling more and more pregnant. I've got that heavy feeling in my lower abdomen letting me know that my uterus is growing in size... it's so exciting to think that there's a little person inside of me, growing daily, and that in a few short months, we'll get to meet this little person. Craziness.

Well, I think I'm going to go sprawl out on the couch, to take advantage of Shepherd's naptime and catch a few winks of sleep myself. Hope you all are having a wonderful day!!

7 week list

Things to do:

-Eat small meals often.... check
-Purchase and take Vitamin B6 supplements... check
-Purchase and wear Sea-bands... check
-Drink Gingerale... check
-Eat Saltine crackers...check
-Stick with Bland Foods...check

Things that don't work:

-Eat small meals often
-Purchase and take Vitamin B6 supplements
-Purchase and wear Sea-bands
-Drink Gingerale
-Eat Saltine crackers
-Stick with Bland Foods

Things I've done today:

-Phoned Ralph on the big white phone
-Gone shopping
-Attempted to eat something
-Spent time hugging Johnny
-Attempted to drink something
-Practiced some more of the lateral cookie toss
-Slept
-Sat here wondering if I should try some more food...

11 months

Shepherd,

Today you turn 11 months old. I feel every one of these letters starts out with some exclamation that "I can't believe you are already x-number of months old", but it's true. I can't hardly believe you are growing up so fast! This month has been a whirlwind of changes, and you've managed surprisingly well.

At the beginning of the month, we found out you were going to be a big brother. I can't tell you how excited I am to see you function in this capacity. You adore other children, smiling at them, and gently patting their hair (sometimes not so gently, but we're working on that). We are so excited to be adding a little brother or sister to your family. You see, mommy and daddy are very close in age to their own brothers, and we wanted that for you. Everyone has asked if this was "planned", which, as you grow up, you'll realize how incredibly rude this is. And our answer has always been emphatically yes. Just as with you. I don't know that anyone knows for sure exactly when to get pregnant, just as we didn't know with you... but, you and your little brother or sister, were always planned. From the moment your father and I said "I do" we knew we'd have children. We both loved children so much, and knew that one day, God would bring you into our lives. And He did... and oh, how he blessed us with you.

You are the most lovable little man I know. This month has really drawn out your personality. You love to imitate us, especially when we make funny faces at you. You laugh and giggle when I kiss you. You chatter on and on and on all day long, in the car, playing, in your high chair, in the bathtub, and sometimes, in the quiet of night, I hear you chatter softly in your sleep. I wish I knew what you are saying. Sometimes, it sounds as though you're telling a story. At others, as if you're issuing a grand proclamation. And still others, when your voice goes quiet, it sounds as though you're whispering a secret, only known to you.

You also started walking this month. Which completely took me by surprise. You had been cruising for several months, and you had tried walking from chair to chair, but showed little interest in walking until this past Monday. My theory is that you saw several of the kids your age at church on sunday, and a handful of them are walking too. So Monday, you decided to walk, full steam ahead. Thankfully, Daddy had the day off, and he was there to witness your first steps. You were playing by the bookshelf, and I turned away to put up a toy you'd been playing with. I was sitting on the floor, and I turned around, and there you were, halfway from the bookshelf to me. And you continued walking to me. I cannot describe what that moment felt like. The only way I can try is to say that it felt as though my heart exploded inside of me, and the only thing I could do was squeel and laugh and kiss you all over. All afternoon, you kept trying again, and trying again, and you did surprisingly well. By Tuesday, crawling was a thing of the past. Your main mode of transportation, walking.

With the walking, has come an incredible exhaustion for both of us. You now sleep entirely through the night, waking up at 5:30am for a bottle from Daddy before he leaves for work, then you go back to sleep, waking up for good around 7:30. This comes at a perfect time, as mommy really, really needs that extra sleep to help the little baby inside of her grow.

You've also developed a strong attachment to Daddy. You regularly look up at the picture of daddy and you in your room and say, "Dada!" When Daddy comes home, you squeal with joy and either run (if you're walking or standing) or crawl to him. When he goes out of your site or when he has to leave for work, you cry. The other night, when Daddy got home, you greeted him as usual, and as he sat down on the floor with you, you gently rested your head against his chest. You'd never done that before, and it was such a special moment that daddy and I almost cried. It was as though you were saying, "Thanks for coming home".

There are so many other things I want to say. Every day, I love you more and more, and every day, I'm amazed at what you can do. I don't want to miss a single moment with you, and find myself missing you when you're napping... wishing I could just snuggle right up next to you and hold you just so I don't miss a moment of you growing up, because, man, does the time fly.

I love you so much little man... and I always will..

Love,

Mommy