Jack-O-Lantern

Jack-O-Lantern
Originally uploaded by meandscreech.

Forrest and I bought this pumpkin almost 2 weeks ago, and it's been sitting on our porch waiting to be carved. Well today, we carved it. Or I should say, Forrest carved it. I just cut the hat out, cleaned the innerds out, and then cleaned up the fine lines. He drew the design and carved it out. I was pretty impressed I must say.
We also toasted pumpkin seeds, which were yummy. If only I had the stuff to make pumpkin pie... we'd be set!
I can't believe Thanksgiving is only 3 1/2 weeks away!! I'm so looking forward to seeing the family. All of my little cousins are going to be at my grandparents house... 4 girls total. Makes for so much fun! I can't wait to bring a little boy into the family... actually, when I think about it, it could be kinda scary to bring a boy into the family... I remember being the only girl on my dad's side, and I wound up playing baseball, war, and all sorts of boy games with them... Hopefully, they won't dress my son up in girly clothes and put makeup on him (when he's old enough to play of course). Another thing I'm looking forward to is seeing my brother. I haven't seen him in like... 2 months. Which for some people isn't that bad, but considering we lived in the same city, saw each other every other day (if not every day)... to go to not seeing each other at all has been hard! He's been really busy though with work, and just got back from a conference in Austin, Texas. It's always really cool to hear what he's doing. He's working for an organization called People of Faith against the Death Penalty, and it's just amazing what he's learned, and been able to pass on to us in our conversations. My brother is so cool! Aren't you jealous?!? :)
Well... I promised Forrest our little trip to Panera wouldn't be too long (we can't really afford to buy anything today, but just needed their free internet) I'd better go. :) Happy Halloween y'all!

For your Entertainment

Here's a link to the nicknames George Bush uses for staff, world leaders, and such... Figures he'd call Vladimir Putin Pootie-poot... *sigh*

Nicknames used by George W. Bush

Kicking

Yes... the baby is most definately kicking now. All... the... time! :) I woke up at 6 am this morning to what felt like the million man march in my belly, only to realize that I was starving. So a nice bowl of cereal, and I was back in bed to sleep a little longer. What's funny is, the baby doesn't want to kick when other people are around... just when mommy is by herself, and can't share the joy of the baby kicking with anyone. He won't kick for Forrest... he wouldn't kick for my mom this weekend... he's just all out stubborn about some things.
But you know what? I'm happy he's kicking. Because the more he kicks, the more I love him. It's becoming real to me now, not only because of the kicking, but because of the name we've picked out. It's a great name, y'all... and I am dying to tell you, but... I must refrain. I know that I'm going to slip up and tell someone the name by accident. I did it once with Forrest's brother, and then again this weekend with my parents at the William and Mary football game. Thankfully, no one heard me either time except Forrest, who threatened divorce if I slipped again (kidding! he wouldn't do that!!!) We're thinking we may give a hint at Christmas to our family (since we're so broke, and hey! what a great gift that's free!!!)... so we'll see what happens.
In other baby-related news... is anyone else as excited as I am that Bush withdrew his nominee for Supreme Court Justice?! Because seriously? Who the HELL is he listening to these days?! It sure ain't Karl Rove... I'm sure the ol' turd blossom isn't in too good of favor with his boss (did you know that Bush actually calls Rove turd blossom? I'm not making this up) There was a recent poll, and Bush's approval rating among blacks is 2%... according to Newsweek, that's lower than Jefferson Davis' approval rating... how they got that information, I have no idea... but seriously? 2%?! Wow... Anyways... I'd probably better step down off my political soapbox, but oh how I enjoy sitting back and watching the Republican party squirm... *evil grin* Is that wrong of me???

Yes, I would like some cheese with my whine..

Because I really need a place to whine, and I'm sure my husband is
about to go crazy from my whining, I figured what better place than my
blog!! You people don't mind do you? Of course not.... :) You're the
perfect friend... so thank you in advance for putting up with my
dramatics.

Why the drama?? My back is flipping killing me... and if it's not my
back, it's my hips... and if it's not my hips... it's the fun ligament
stretching. My poor husband now shares the bed with a 190+ lb woman, 6
pillows, and a LOT of grunting and mumbling about how my son is
killing his mother slowly but surely. At first I tried to blame it on
our mattress. We were naive, and still recovering from the brick
mattresses they provide in college dorms, so we purchased the softest
mattress money could buy when we got married. Now? I hate the dang
thing... It's impossible to get out of in the morning, and when two
people are in bed, we roll to the middle... it's like quicksand... So
this weekend, when we went to visit my mom and dad, we got to stay at
this nice condo in Williamsburg. There, they had nice firm
mattresses... "Ahhh... relief!" I thought... and then wham! back
spasms!! and then wham!! ligament pain. So much so that I called my
doctor crying, wondering if there was any medicine I could take...
morphine please?!?! She said, only thing you can do is take tylenol,
and apply heat (which I'd already done)... I whimpered and asked if
that was it... and she was pretty much like, yep.. suck it up ya big
whiner (only she was very very nice, and I couldn't help but love her
even if she couldn't help me). I've tried walking, stretching,
sitting, everything... we even bought a massage thingy for Forrest to
rub my back with, and that helps some... but not nearly enough.
Maybe this is just a phase... maybe my body is just going through hell
right now, but in a week... all will be well. Anyone have hope for
me? Does it get better? Because right now... I don't know how on
EARTH I'm going to get through labor if I'm crying because my back
hurts. I'm such a wuss... *pout* So HELP ME!!! internets... what
should I do!?!

Transparency

Because life is just beautiful...
Originally uploaded by meandscreech.

I rarely talk about religion on here because it's such an inflamatory subject, but there have been a few things on my mind lately that I've just got to express somewhere. That's what I love about my blog, to just be able to hurl my questions and my feelings out into the world.
If you've dug much through my archives you can sense that my husband and I are Christians. However, what you don't know is how incredibly personal faith is to me (and my husband, but for now I speak for myself) and how incredibly torn I feel between two worlds. Between who I am as a person of faith, and who the world assumes me to be as a person of faith. There are two camps that I wrestle with constantly... The conservative right, and the liberal left. Because of my beliefs on faith and God, with my liberal friends, it's assumed that I'm a die-hard Bush supporter, that I support the death penalty, I'm pro-choice, I'm a homophob, that I probably read my Bible everyday, know every scripture out there, never curse, and most certainly never, ever drink. Granted, my close friends know this not to be true. I genuinely despise George Bush because of what he's done to the Christian church. I despise him just as I despise Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, and increasingly more and more, James Dobson. I wish to have nothing to do with the Moral Majority, and in my opinion, they are neither Moral nor are they in the majority. It would seem that way from the media representation that they get. I enjoy a good drink and have been pining for a Mai Tai for the last month... and cannot wait to have my first drink post-partum. As far as the other issues, I only delve into them with close friends because I'm often afraid I'll be misunderstood when trying to explain my take on the issues... but in sum, I definately don't believe that the world is so black and white to even begin to "know" the answer to such tough issues as gay marriage, abortion, etc... all I know is what's in my heart... and that I have a special place in my heart for those who are cast out of christian churches for their "sins". I was always taught as a child that God is a God of Love... and the most infuriating thing to me is that I don't see any love coming out of most "christian" churches or leaders.
As far as the flip side of the coin, I feel that my Christian friends see me as somewhat of a heretic... well, not really that harsh, but I've always been that "liberal, christian" friend in most of those circles. It's frustrating because they constantly sing the praises of the Republican Powerhouse, of the Moral Majority, and generally are very close-minded when it comes to those gray areas. I'm always the one they pray for (or at least I have been the one they pray for), the one they fear is backsliding into the flames of hell, and the one who always has trouble holding my tongue.
Thankfully, God has blessed me with a husband who is both understanding and very much like me in these areas. It's embarrasing to us when my grandfather spouts off crap about gays, teenagers these days, and how Katrina happened because the people of New Orleans were vile, sinful people. There are times when I want to scream at the top of my lungs that his mind is poisoned by the 700 club and Fox News...But you know what? As much as it kills me sometimes, I have to love people like that. Because if I truely believe that God loves everyone... that includes them.
I guess the reason for all of this is I feel so trapped. So often I don't love those who need love. I'm judemental, hateful, pessemistic, cynical, and downright angry sometimes. And maybe this post is just me letting it go. It's me saying I'm sorry to all of those people I've judged. It's me saying I will try harder to love you to all the people I haven't loved. And it's me crying out to God for some understanding in this crazy world where nothing is black and white... and everything is gray. And I know.... I know... that He hears me, and holds me... he doesn't change things to make my life easier... but he helps me through. If only I'm honest and transparent with myself, with others, and with Him.

ARGH!!!!

It's too early in the morning to type up a kick-ass entry, only to lose it..... I think I'm going home to crawl back into bed.... *pout*

New Link

Hey guys, I've been meaning to add Isabel's link to our bloglist... go check her out at http://holaisabel.blogspot.com/
She's an expecting mommy just like me :) So go drop by and say "Hola!" to her :)

What a stud....

What a stud....
Originally uploaded by meandscreech.

Seriously, my husband is the hottest thing ever... especially when clinging to the side of a cliff... :) Here he is manuvering a 5.8 up at Carderock, Maryland... we had a blast... well, I just sat there and ate, while watching the other three hurl themselves up the side of a cliff, pulling muscles, and generally exerting themselves... :) So here's to my hottie husband who climbs rocks while I sit on my fat butt and pig out on Doritos... and loves me anyways :) I love you sweetie!!!

Long Week

This week has been pretty long. Last friday, Forrest's brother and his brother's girlfriend came up to visit us. We had a great time visiting DC, rockclimbing (no, I did not climb, I just took pictures), and just hanging out. We saw them off yesterday morning bright and early. So needless to say, Forrest and I were a lil' bit tired. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely LOVE having company... in fact, that's one thing I do well... hosting company. But I was completely unprepared for hosting company when pregnant. No one warned me of this. But I think that the weekend went well, and I know that we enjoyed seeing them.
Monday night, Forrest had to work late, and his brother and girlfriend were in DC with friends, so I drove in to pick them all up. We ate at a wonderful, WONDERFUL restaurant. Harambe. It's an Eritrean restaurant on the corner of 18th and U St. (Eritrea is a country in the horn of Africa, and was at one point a part of Ethiopia, so if you've ever had Ethiopian food, you've had something very similar). Let me just tell you, if I will crave anything in this pregnancy, it will be Eritrean Food. It was to DIE FOR! I can't shut up about it, and have begged Forrest to go back there to eat this week! ('cept we're so broke we can't afford to) But anyways, after dinner, we all headed home and hung out. After we saw our company off on Wednesday, I crashed at home. And I crashed hard. I napped all day on the couch watching A Baby Story and various other TLC classics. During one of the shows, I had my hand on my belly, and the baby kicked! HARD!! It was so exciting that I called Forrest at work to tell him about it. I've been feeling the baby move more and more, and the more I feel him move, the more I love him. I guess that's because it's becoming more real (if that's how you say it). Reality is settling in, and I'm overjoyed that we've been blessed with a son. We've even picked the name, so it's all I can do to keep it to myself since we've agreed to keep the name a secret until the baby is born. But I will say this... it's an incredibly awesome name. :)
Anyways... I feel like this post has had no structure whatsoever, so I'd probably better wrap it up before it gets too long. I promise to have more structure next time... until then....

Family

Family
Originally uploaded by meandscreech.

Yesterday, I began to realize how important family is. I've known for a long time that family is important, but never have I realized it more than with this move up to VA. It's so easy to feel isolated and far away from the ones you love, especially when you long to be accepted for who you are.
I laughed when I found this picture in our photo album because it's my father-in-law and his mother. The picture looks like it belongs on the front of a greeting card or something. Something about it reminded me of family and how when you think you've no way out, your family is there to pick you up. Bob (father-in-law) has helped us out a lot over the last year and half, and of all the people in our family, he's the furthest away in Charleston, SC. But no matter the miles between family and us, they will always be there for us... through good and bad. Yes, we may fight with them, we may argue with them, we may not even like them all the time, but the truth deep down inside is that they are always there to love us... no matter what.
Ain't family just grand?!

Holy Smokes...

Cutie Pies
Originally uploaded by meandscreech.

Aren't these girls the most precious things you've ever seen!?! These are my cousins :) Lyvia will turn 3 this year, and Peri isn't quite a year old but will turn 1 in December. Just think of the cuteness that's to come with our little boy added to the ensemble!!! :)

My trip to Harris Teeter yesterday was t-totally wonderful. I felt normal again. There's something about having the familiar around to ease the transition from there to here. I spent an hour shopping for groceries, and even though it took me 30 minutes to get home from the store, it was totally worth it. Now I must petition the hubby to move us closer to Fairfax, just for the Harris Teeter (because I'm silly like that). And last night, I fixed the first meal I felt proud of, and felt normal about fixing since we've moved here. It felt pretty dadgum good too. And then, as if all the cosmic stars aligned themselves properly, NC State Football was on ESPN... and, if things couldn't get better, THEY WON!!!!!!!!!!!!! FINALLY! Yea, we may be 1 and 2 in the conference, but hey... we beat out a ranked team. Between Forrest immitations of Chuck Amato (the man can't talk y'all!! I worked with him at State!!) and the hilariously stupid commercials, we had a blast. My favorite part was this one commercial for Professional Wrestling, and the announcer was making all sorts of references to The Crucible, and Brave New World. Forrest then turns to me and says, "Dude, this is some sophisticated stuff! Those wrestlers must be a whole lot smarter than we give them credit for!" Who knew!?
Well, I've gone on long enough, but just wanted to bring y'all up to date that things were good last night.... VERY good... :) State won, there is a Harris Teeter, and all is well... :)

Holy CRAP!!!!!!!

There's a Harris Teeter in Fairfax....... I'm so there. Am I pathetic or what?!?!

Southern Comfort

I'm not sure if it's the pregnancy or what, but lately I've been missing my Southern Comfort. And no, I don't mean the liquor. I miss everything about North Carolina, even though Virginia has been incredibly wonderful to us. I miss our old townhome, I miss the ladies I worked with, I miss my family, I miss being an hour and a half to the beach and 3 hours from the mountains. Yes...I say the mountains because there are no mountains here like the ones in Boone, NC. I miss my favorite mexican restaurant, El Rodeo, my favorite pizzeria, I *heart* NY Pizza... I broke down sobbing last night because I miss grocery shopping at Harris Teeter. What is the DEAL with some of these grocery stores up here. I swear, it's like stepping back in time once you've experienced the joys of shopping in style at Harris Teeter. And the thing of it is, I'm crying because I miss a freakin grocery store! What's more, I miss my friends... my brother, our church, our friends... I miss knowing exactly where everything is, and where the fun things to do are. So last night, Forrest came home, and the only thing I could do was cry. I cried for an hour straight, listing off the various things that I missed from NC. I felt terrible, because the last thing I want is for Forrest to feel that I regret moving (since it was his job that relocated us). Because there are wonderful things about living here. I haven't forgotten that. It's just there are days when I wish I was home.
Maybe I'm too isolated. I just have no idea where to begin with the search for friends. Am I just supposed to strike up a conversation with a complete stranger? Or do we have to post an ad in the paper... "Married couple, looking for fantabulous friends to hang out with, who share our sense of humor, either have or will have children soon, and who aren't bleeding right wing conservatives." I just feel lonely... and honestly, the only connection I feel to the real world is the time I get to come out to Panera or the Library and check blogs. I relish in the details of other peoples lives, and wish somehow I could be friends with them. But then reality sets in, and I realize how incredibly awkward that would be. "Hey, you don't know me, but since I read your blog everyday, I feel like I know you... do you want to be my friend? Check yes or no" HA!
As much as everyone in my family likes to say how outgoing I am, and how I never meet a stranger, on the inside? I'm terrified. I'm incredibly shy when it comes to meeting new people. I'm scared they won't like me. I'm afraid of sticking my neck out there to make new friends. It's like stage fright, only worse. I can get up in front of people and read or act, even if I've never met them... but making friends??? That's a whole other ball game. Have you ever gone through this? What suggestions do you have for making new friends?