Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Brought to you by your local Mormon Church...

I'm sitting here in the library in the middle of 5 mormon missionaries. I'm guessing the mormon bicycle convention has moved to town, and they're here checking their e-mail (they can't have cars, but they can e-mail!?!? who knew?!?) I've seen the guy next to me lean back and glance at my computer screen several times, so I've been very, very tempted to type something incredibly leud and vulgar in large font to startle him, nosey lil' missionary! Or maybe pull up a semi-obscene photo and laugh at it, and nudge him to join me in my sin and laugh at the obscenities I put forth on my computer. But no, I'm much nicer than that. However, with a few of the guys staring at my growing belly, I kinda want to say to them, "Yeah, I got knocked up and I can't remember who the dad is. Would you like a second or third wife? I'm obviously very fertile!" But then again...that wouldn't be nice. The whole reason for my annoyance towards these guys is that, seriously... they were hogging all 20 of the computers when I walked in. TWENTY mormon missionaries using the libraries computers. What they're looking at, I have no idea. They all have their little daytime agendas open on the desks (I noticed that they were all the same as I walked around looking for a computer) so maybe they're scouting out neighborhoods? The guy next to me is e-mailing furiously, to whom, I can only guess his 2nd or 3rd wife. I jest... I jest... but seriously, all 20 computers? Come on guys!! Take turns, share the love!!
Anyways.... so I finally snagged a computer. And here I am posting away, going on and on about the mormon missionaries. I can't seem to stop thinking about them. Wondering what drives people to join the church, wear special underwear, not drink caffeine, and ride bikes everywhere, even in the pouring rain. What makes a person wake up one day and say, HEY! I'd like to wear a white shirt and tie, with a nametag every day for the next two years. And have doors slammed in my face. I have no idea. Uh oh... I'd better change subjects... they're gathering around behind me, waiting on my neighbor to finish his e-mail to his lovely bride to be. I just pray that I get out of the library without being solicited into a conversation with them.
In other news, my mother-in-law and father-in-law are coming up this weekend. My mother-in-law has never been to DC so we're gonna have fun driving around town showing her the sites. She made only one request. To see where George W. lives so she can flip him the bird. Have I mentioned how much I love my mother-in-law!??! :) But seriously, we're excited that they get to come up and see our apartment, see where Forrest works, and see the hospital where their grandson will be born. If any of you are from DC and have a suggestion for something people just have to do while in DC, feel free to comment and let us know.
Uh oh... the guys are tag-teaming the computers now... I'd better go hide in the sex-education stacks as I'm sure they'll avoid that like the plague!

1 comment:

Isabel said...

That is too bad that the Missionaries were hogging all the computers. I imagine they were all just excited about getting the chance to write back home (wherever that may be) to their families who they don't see for the entire 2 years they are away from home.

How great that family is coming out to visit you guys. That is awesome. My Mom just told me she's coming out to visit me in two weeks. I can't wait (and I may just tell her I'm pregnant while she's here in person!!)