6 months

Shepherd,

Yesterday you turned 6 months old. I wanted to write something then, but was afraid that my words could not adequately portray my heart. I have thought all day long, and still, words fail me. You have grown so much and so fast this past month that I simply cannot wrap my mind around these changes fast enough. For starters, you're still teething.


Although you have two beautiful pearly whites, you still have not cut another tooth. This would be okay if the hidden teeth weren't bothering you so bad. Everything that can go in your mouth goes in your mouth. On some days, drool flows as the Nile, and there's the tell-tell drool rash on the tip of your chin which, despite your mothers every attempt to keep it dry, persists. But that doesn't seem to bother you as much as your ears, which you tug on pretty hard some days.


Other days, you're pretty serious. You talk with a serious look on your face, as though telling me some long ago secret that we adults have forgotten. You observe everything around you with seriousness, and take on your newest challenge of crawling with such passion, I feel as though you could will yourself across the room. You touch everything, learning the textures as though reading a book in Braille. You take it all in. And those days just blow me away.


Other days, you want to cuddle. This is a new thing, because up until now, you've refused to sit still long enough to be held for any amount of time. The best is when we take naps together. We both fall asleep, and I wake up to little hands pummelling my breast, as if someone has turned the tap off. As my eyes flutter open, you break into a broad grin, showing off those beautiful teeth, and sometimes, if I'm lucky, you giggle. You pound away again, as if letting me know that you are being denied. I let you nurse a little longer, as you suckle, then break away to smile at me. This, is my favorite part of nursing now.. the moments you break away to look up at me and coo.


Another thing I'm learning is that you're very quick. I turn my back on you for one second, and you've rolled clear across the room. Not only are you quick, but you're quite sneaky. Just when I think I've got my bases covered and nothing is in your reach that ought not to be, I find you holding some forbidden fruit, joyfully beaming at your discovery. Your favorite finds are the remote, my cell phone, daddy's glasses, and books. Books which your father has protected for years, and fussed at mommy for bending and breaking the spine. And within seconds, all of those years are laid to waste as you suck on the corners of the pages, bending, warping, and ruining perfectly good books. But truth be told? It makes mommy a little bit happy to see you ruin those books, because mommy hates perfect books. I prefer my books worn in, as proof that I have read them. Proof that they don't just sit on my shelf gathering dust. But lets not tell daddy, okay??


But most other days are wonderful days, full of laughter and fun. We wake up early, play with your toys, and then eat some breakfast. Then we go back to playing again until it's naptime. You sit up almost all the time now, unless you're trying to crawl. You've even learned to catch yourself when you start to fall from sitting. You've also been trying something new recently. You're trying to go from sitting to crawling, which, blows my mind to pieces. Yesterday, you actually got pretty close to crawling position from sitting, and at the last minute, with one great heave, you launched yourself forward, face-planting into the carpet. But that does not stop you.


You are stubborn, as your mother, yet determined as your father. You simply don't give up. I love this about you. You work so hard at what you do, and you give 200% at everything. I only hope this trait will last a lifetime, allowing you to pursue everything your heart desires with great passion.


Shepherd, you are so close to taking off. Not just physically, with crawling, though it's certain you could start that any day now. But emotionally and mentally as well. Each day, you put more pieces to the puzzle of life together, and I am so blessed to be your audience, daily cheering you on, and helping you when you allow me to help. I am your biggest fan, and hope that no matter the future circumstances, I will always be your loudest supporter (alongside Daddy, of course). I pray that each day that I'm given with you, I fully appreciate all that I have, and that I savor each and every moment with you, because, pardon my french, "Damn, do they fly by."

Love,
Mommy